David and Alf are sitting at a table in the Rod and Gun Hotel (known locally as the Rotten Guts) waiting for their beers. David has a hand puppet with him and Alf wants to know the story.

Why a hand puppet? Well, I’m lonely.

So you made a hand puppet of your mother!

A boy’s best friend is his mother.

They both study the puppet.

Alf is particularly impressed with the puppet’s clothing. Definitely a classy mother. Red blouse and long black skirt. Abundant dark hair in a bun. Kind of Spanish-looking. An im-posing and dramatic matron. Apparently David’s mother does not have a name yet.

Alf’s nose begins to twitch rabbit-like, something about the puppet bothers him and he changes the subject.

He asks if David saw the picture in the paper yesterday of the twelve-year-old girl who was struck by a car at night. The paramedics had to cut her clothing off, and the picture showed her clothes neatly spread out on the road in the darkness and rain.

The utter starkness of it! David exclaims in a falsetto voice, the puppet theatrically tossing her head and focusing on Alf. A strangely melancholy photograph . . .

Moose, the Rotten Guts afternoon waiter and tap man, drops their beer and looks coolly at the puppet. Alf and David are regulars; first time for the puppet. Can I get something for her? he asks with Moose humour.

For a puppet! Both together. Well, all three together.

As David reaches for his glass of beer, his Mother puts her puppet arms protectively around it. She suggests that he’s been drinking a bit too much of late and David explains to his Mother that this is the first beer of the day with his very best friend, and that he will try very hard to be moderate. As they proceed to wrestle over the beer, both tugging at the glass, Jeffrey joins them. David stops and nonchalantly introduces his Mother.

He informs her that Jeffrey is a professor of drama at Mala-spina College.

His Mother can see that Jeffrey is not some common ne’er-do-well leading her son astray like some people she won’t bother to mention, although she’s a little miffed when Jeffrey ignores her and orders something plebeian. A draft beer, if you please. She was certain real professors of drama drank Glen-fiddich.

After Moose drops the beer, Jeffrey facetiously toasts "the revolution" and Alf cynically adds: What revolution! Jesus, I wish! Hunches on his elbows.

David’s Mother certainly doesn’t think they are very well-informed. If they’d spend some time on the Internet Indymedia instead of wasting their time in pubs! Didn’t they realize that the students recently took over the principal’s office at Queen’s University? Apparently "he" was trying to deregulate tuition. The students explained what that would mean to people and asked for comments, and there were certainly lots of comments.

One opined that education should be free and another retorted that education has always been nothing more than indoctrination used for control, and that had to change. One objected to that, pointing out the vitality of the university environment and how it was full of radical thought. They all are well aware of the threat of corporations to education. I was proud of them, she said, looking askance at David.

She wasn’t particularly proud of him at the moment.

Jeffrey was laughing and spluttering. He adored theatre when it had bite, even if it was only a hand puppet in a pub. He was so excited that he started to tell Alf and David about his Drama Festival that was coming up, then he remembered that David had been involved in Little Theatre at one time, of course! yes! and so he enthusiastically urged him to whip up a play or something and enter it. You’d love it!

A puppet-theatre play?

Well, no . . . no, he hadn’t seen a puppet-theatre play entered in any festival.

David’s Mother wants to know just why not! She confides to David that they could invite him to one of the rehearsals, with a Glenfiddich, of course, and maybe he could offer some suggestions, if he has any. Her son has gone up a notch.

They work in Alf’s workshop. At David’s place his clutter of books gets in the way. They decide to make string puppets and convert Mother into a marionette. Make a stand for her so she can watch what is going on. Alf and David first mass-produce a bunch of bodies out of wood. Then Alf works on a puppet stage while David and his new girlfriend Marne work on the puppets. Make them into living caricatures.

Marne is skinny, with straggly black hair, and goes around in bare feet. She confides to Alf that she lives in an abandoned car at a wreckers and argues with David about what kind of puppets they’re making. She wants an in-your-face political kind of puppet. The one he’s working on is of his sister. With orange wool hair!

Marne: You don’t even have a sister!

Mother: Did he tell you that? Actually he has an older sister who used to beat him up all the time. Really!

Alf: Big Sister! Hey, a political puppet play!

Working this way they have a half-dozen puppets by the time the stage is finished. Sort of like an empty miniature theatre. They line the puppets across the stage and study them. A puppet audition. The heavy producers with their director. Marne sings "Maybe This Time" from the musical A Chorus Line. Alf thinks A Chorus Line is all girls. They look more like David’s family. David tells them he never had a family and that he always wanted one. They drink beer and practise with the string puppets.

It gets weird. They drink enough beer that after a time the puppets become neurotic projections and they begin to argue. Big Sister tells her Little Brother that he lives in a dream world. You have to become political! You know, think politically for once in your life! Mother, of course, defends Little Brother’s sensitivity. Father thinks it’s time for another beer. Mother and Big Sister viciously turn on him. He’s a drunk. That’s what their childhood memories of him are. A father who’s a drunk. Father tells them to let him know when they decide what play they are doing. He’s having a beer.

David tells them that he already has a play in mind. It’s called Greek Tragedy and is taken from a true story in the newspaper. It’s about a married couple who have a mentally handicapped daughter, he explains. So you knew what puppets you wanted all along? Marne asks. No. WHAT! Come on, David!

They get into a discussion. A theatre company is putting on a play and people from the community come and audition. The puppets are the people from the community. They’re very average people. Yes. Like we are. We construct ourselves. Supposing we’d dressed the puppets in Shakespearean costumes? Very average people wearing courtly clothes. Kind of morality play? Okay. They are as they are. I guess. Okay, the setting? A bare stage. An absolutely bare stage! Spooky, man! Alf’s nose is twitching.

He and Marne want to know more about the people on this bare stage thing.

Well, the main character is the Father, the Mother never appears [I never appear! What kind of play doesn’t have the Mother appear! Quiet Mother!], the handicapped daughter, a chorus of four average people, and two stock psychologist types. We only have six puppets. We can make another one. Right! Let’s try the opening scene. Big Sister and Father. And the other four as chorus. Right!

The girl’s name is Cassandra and she’s at stage front awkwardly trying to play hopscotch. The Father is sadly watching her from stage left. Distant. The chorus crowds closer at stage right. They want to know what Cassandra is doing.

Alf and Marne and David practise with the marionettes. Marne uses the orange wool-haired puppet of Big Sister. Makes her mentally defective. Diminishes her. They have problems working with the four puppets for the chorus. Well, they don’t have to move that much. Okay, okay, I know! I know! They make a tape of all the voices in the play. It doesn’t matter. It’s their first time. In fact it’s pretty good! The are excited and phone Jeffrey to come to the next rehearsal. Help us!